Thursday, 21 October 2010

Teaching Challenges

I've been an English trainee teacher for two weeks now which BTW felt as if two months , and as I said earlier , I've been concerned about this experience since forever. Teaching would be the hugest challenge to take for a quite troubled young lady like myself ! and lemme tell you one of the frustrating things , when people learn about the fact that I'm being a secondary school teacher they go like O.O WHHHHAT?! it always feels like I'm not cut out for it whatsoever! but still , to be honest with you , I find it right at some points :D As a tiny person , I would be a tremendous mockery to stand in front of students who are waaaay taller and larger than me! However , the size issue is something I believe I could handle xD

From the very first day I came in the school , I tried to kick my social anxiety out of the nearest window and to -like every body has been telling me- act bold and brave and yes I would yell at the girl who even looks at me if it took me to ! And here is one fact , it was STUPID! literally stupid :s and then I started to think WHY would I do that ? I just have to be myself , right ? OK .. I was myself , and I was able to do it. I controlled the class and I was calm. I felt good about myself till I started to get followed by almost all the girls in the school to 'Ashfa3' for them because they were running away from their classes. What the WHAT ??? It turned out that my reputation in the school was of such a new freakin' sweet English teacher who is obviously and sincerely loved by all the staff and could present a good 'shafa3a' O.O although I've never done it. Crazy , right ?

Anyways , my very big fat challenge was to -for almost the first time- stand in a room that's masha'Allah stuffed with human beings while trying to make a very good first impression. I think I've pulled it off Al7amdu li Allah. My first class was very good , not awesome but good considering my freaked out state of mind & body ! :D It was actually weird that I felt nervous for the first five minutes and then when I saw those shiny eyes following me eagerly as I paced the class , I pulled myself together and went on. The lesson went very smoothly and my kids were very active and participant. They were asking about the words' meanings and answering questions I ask and asking me to repeat if they couldn't understand. I felt great and I was like ' How come people say teaching sucks and teaching is difficult and bla bla ??????????? ' for real , easy peasy lemon squeezy !

The answer to the question came right away as the period was over. Two students came to me while I was arranging my stuff and the rest of the class was leaving and they said ' Teacher , we didn't understand our lesson today' Uh-oh !! I asked why ? they said that I spoke English all the time. I replied back that if I didn't do so they'll never learn. One of them uttered madly ' English is very difficult , English is devastating , we hate English ya teacher ' I was astonished , but I promised that I'll make it easier for them next time. They thanked me and left. <<--Oh snaaap , this is really getting difficult !

I felt responsible for these girls and the many many others who didn't come to me. I tried to make it easier for them the next class , and I was sooooo happy to see Yasmeen and Manar participating and nodding their heads every time I ask 'Did you understand'. At the same class , in the evaluation part , I was asking my students to give me sentences and do exercises about the rule I've just explained, and there was a student at the back who was nodding and responding 'YES' and laughing all the way , and I was actually noticing that she was turning her book to a page that is not even close to ours! I came to her. I smiled and said ' Razan is so active today , isn't she? ' she smiled and I asked her to do the next exercise. The girl went blue O.O She stood up and started scratching her skull ' uh .. umm ....' She uttered. I asked her whether or not she was with me. Her answer was very quick as she said 'NO' I groaned ' OH MY GOD ! is this another disaster ???!'

I asked her to write down what's written on the board , and she told me she doesn't want to. I dared to ask why , and she answered she will take it from one of the girls. I lost my nerves by then , but I withheld. I told her in a sharp tone to write her lesson. She nodded and I went on my lesson. A minute later , the only thing happened is Razan drawing her chair and making a noise as she goes. She stopped right in front of the board , sat down and started to write. I wasn't amazed as much as I was scared of the action she took! My eyes were popped out and my jaw was dropped. I stopped my lesson and asked ' Razan ? What are you doing ?' she said 'يا أبلة إنتِ قلتِ لي اكتبي الدرس ' I asked her if she can't see from her place , and she said that she could see clearly !!! I dunno , what exactly was that ????

Boy , during these couple of weeks I saw things for the first time in my life. It's a whole total different world from the ones I lived during my life time. In elementry school I was the headmistress's spoiled daughter! In intermediate and secondary school I was in my mother's friend's school , and I was my teachers' beloved student. Likewise in the university , I'm this quiet nerd who usually kept to herself. But now , I AM A TEACHER. I'm resposible for something like 100 or more students from complete different cultures and backgrounds. I have to deal with each and every one of them in her way .. Awesome , right?

Among the new things I faced during these mad weeks is the misbehaved and rude , and sometimes the hyperactive students. I dealt with them in different ways. I sent some to the headmistress and she did what's needed -BTW , our headmistress scares the hell out of the students and BTW , that didn't work- Some of them I was able to discipline by getting them on my side. I ask one of them for example to come and sit on the computer and to click enter every time I ask her to in case of using a PowerPoint presentation. I ask another one to distribute the handouts and it actually worked and was amazingly helpful.

I have noticed that dealing with them this way i.e. the nice way , was more efficient. They were bearing with me , and I could tell from their eyes that they understood and that they're interested! It was really hard to try to maintain respect and control in the class while at the same time I busted my ass off to make it alive and most importantly for my students to feel safe while I'm around. If I was just able to do that , I will be so happy and satisfied.

That's it for now. Will fill you in with the updates soon. Thanks for your time and vaya con dios all :)


Meme said...

i am sure you well be great teacher and maybe razan is trying to get your attention some Ss do this

IamSilla said...

seriously if u were my english i will b sooooo HAPPPY T.T u seem to b concern about ur students, not like my teachers. most of them are chinese n they look down towards malays!! urgh. so went everytime they tried to mess around with me i will just answer them back by saying i dnt understand anything from u, n my english is good not bcoz of u! its bcoz of my mum!!! ( well its true tho), well i think u should know razan more. there must b a reason why is she like this right? good luck n all the best TEACHER or uztazah hehehe :P


Abrar said...

Meme ,
No , she doesn't seem to be so! The rest of the students were as amazed as I was! It was very awkward :s

My Silla ,
Awww, thank you. I'll be so happy to have you for a student wallahi :p
LOLZ you actually said that ? Heheehhe
Thank you , and OH MY GOD !!! you speak Arabic ???!!!!!

IamSilla said...

yes i did say dat.i was mean ahaha. neaaah .i just know a few words only :( and also some malay words are originally from arabic words. dats y. ahahaha but i will b glad if u become my arabic uztazah HEHEHE


Abrar said...

Aha , I see :)
I'll be glad too my eager 'telmetha' :p that's student in English xD

¤•˚Zαìήαβ˚•¤ said...

that's amazing! I know I'd a horrible teacher I simply can't stand explaining anything to anyone lol

IamSilla said...

wohoo!!1 new word for today :D syukran uztazah


Abrar said...

Zainab ,
Makes one of us ;)

My Silla ,
Afwan my telmeetha :**